Dear Geek Council,
Thank you for XBox Live. Actually, thank you for online gaming in general. I know it gets a bum rap from most due to the belief that it’s just a gathering place for antisocial lowlifes or its potential home-wrecking capabilities. But seriously, you just can’t beat the entertainment that comes from it regardless of the side of the spectrum you’re on. On the plus side you’re apt to meet a multitude of people who are into the same things as you from any number of corners of the world. But the other side of the coin exists that filthy underbelly of that can be just as entertaining. I’m particularly fond of the rage-quitters, those wonderful individuals that exit out of a game right at the moment of your triumph in order to rob you of the satisfaction of victory.
But my favorite has got to be the constant trash-talker who is either riddling you with homophobic and/or racist banter while they’re winning, or calling you everything but a child of God when they’re losing. I also find it particularly amusing that most trash-talkers assume that I possess mystic powers over a game not unlike Neo, and choose to wield my awesome capabilities to cheat. I was unaware that it was considered bad form to punish a player for leaving himself wide open after mistiming an attack, especially one that they’d been abusing repeatedly. I suppose etiquette dictates that I stand there and continue to take the abuse, both from the game and over my headset.
Also, I feel that I missed the memo that guys can only use male characters in fighting games. If someone from the office would be so kind to forward me a copy, I’ll be sure to keep that on file for future reference.
PS- Should anyone be looking for me, I’m NinjaMani on XBox Live. Currently addicted to Soul Calibur V, I might not be the best player out there, but I can at least promise that I won’t call you an ass-whore. Unless, of course, I actually know you.